How My Client’s Retreat Changed My Life

After consulting with Eric Plantenburg to help build out their online community experience, I had the wild opportunity to go experience the Abundant Living Retreat in person.

I’ve never participated in a container quite like this and it’s difficult to explain, but I will share it was the most transformative experience of my life. Personal evolution aside, there were some things about the facilitation of the experience that had a huge impact on the experience.

These are my observations as a participant and community strategist.

Observation #1: The Container

The container for your community experience is a combination of time, location, rules, rituals, and rhythms.

Amateur community folks will see the container simply as the vehicle through which to send your message.

Masterful community creators see the container as the third teacher.

While online environments make it more challenging (not impossible) to create transformative containers, in-person retreats get a shortcut to possibility. In community strategy terms, we call setting and welcoming people into the container “onboarding.”

The entire first day (well half of a day) was dedicated to onboarding, reviewing the rules, rhythms, and rituals, and posturing members to be able to get the most out of this retreat. This was an intense process as about 2 hours in to the retreat they collected our electronic devices to stow safely out of reach for the next 4 days.

I see far too many community creators (myself included) breeze past our onboarding experience with the “need to know” details on how to log in and completely miss the most important step: posturing your members.

Eric did this expertly by creating a micro-experience in the onboarding that prepared us for the rest of the retreat. When he took our phones, he gave us a taste of what was ahead.

British anthropologist, Robin Dunbar, speculated that “as much as 42% of the group's time would have to be devoted to social grooming.” Put in community terms, 42% of your community’s time should be devoted to onboarding and posturing your members in the space.

Observation #2: Trust the process

If there is one posture your members must grasp in order to truly receive the transformation you are offering, it's this: trust the process.

Helping your members understand the emotions they are experiencing (whether it resistance, anger, frustration, or doubt) are normal AND they are here because something in their life isn’t working the way that they want.

In showing up, they’ve acknowledged they desire a different outcome.

The only way you will get a different outcome is to try something different.

Your brain and your body doesn’t like this, that’s why we’re here.

They say the definition of crazy is to do the same thing over and over again and expect the same results.

If you’re tired of feeling crazy, you have to try something different.

Trust the process.

Observation #3: Trust your intuition

If the #1 posture for your members is trust the process, this second posture is equally important and oppositely true, but RARELY do I see it implemented. It’s this: trust your intuition.

Eric’s short-hand for this took it even further: “ask for what you need.”

He repeated again and again and again: “ask for what you need.”

In this short-hand, the members do 3 things.

→ First, they have to identify what they need.

→ Second, they have to ask themselves if they really, truly need it.

→ And finally, they have to overcome resistance and ask for it (meaning they really, actually, really do need it.).

Observation #4: Hold the tension

If you’ve ever gone rock climbing, you’re familiar with the term “belay” to refer to a variety of techniques to hold tension on the climbing rope so the climber doesn’t fall far before the rope stops them.

“Belay on” is the voice command issued by your non-climbing partner to indicate they are prepared to keep tension of the rope as you climb, keeping you safety.

The voice commands go something like this:

Climber when ready: “On belay?”

Belayer says: “Belay on.”

Did you catch that?

The belayer says: “I’ve got you. I will hold this tension for you so you can freely, climb, explore, and reach new heights.”

Eric, having facilitated events and gatherings for upwards of 20 years, knows how to hold tension.

Later in the car, Eric shared that usually someone at the retreat will try to fight him. We got close this year, but his ability to embrace the crowd’s palpable tension for our growth was remarkable.

My own experience

While it’s difficult to put into words (let alone on paper), I think the best way to describe the experience is it’s like emotional strength training. Which sounds cute, until you realize what strength training does - it tears your muscles to build them up stronger.

Here’s a few things I noticed from my own reflections.

1. Other people's business and God's business is none of my business.

2. I'm the only one who knows what serves me.

3. When I am in pursuit of being right, I forfeit discovering what serves me.

4. My anger doesn't serve me.

5. Embracing my state will allow it to dissipate.

6. Discomfort makes my brain bigger and better.

7. I resist being uncomfortable.

8. What I resist will persist.

9. My hips hold a lot - release them often.

10. Pain and pleasure are 2 sides of the same coin.

11. If you're not excited to write down your dream every single day, it's not juicy enough.

    
    

This retreat challenged my greatest discomfort and fears, broke down my emotional blocks, and through somatic practices, eye contact, and visualization, created new neural pathways in my brain.

On the final day, my partner and I came back together sharing that this had changed our lives.

To read more about the results of our partnership and the community, you can read the full case study with Izozi.

True to his brilliance, for Eric, this work is an overflow from the abundance he’s found because of this work. The goal of the retreat is to break even financially.

Membership to the Izozi community costs $49 per month and it’s open to retreat attendees and now, for the first time, non-retreat attendees - you can check it out and join here (this is an affiliate link).

And one final note, if any of this speaks to you and you’re interested in joining for the 2026 retreat (me and Connor will be there!), please send me a note, I’d love to share more and get you a ticket.